Can i change schools?

Its immpossible. It really iz. Those girls at school drove me to cuttin the one of thwem had the balls to ask me why i cut infront of everyone(and they were also talkon trash about me rite behind my back). I snapped and my EXACT words after she said "do you cut yourself?" i said "yes, and if you dont shut up i'll do the same to your throat." then like 6 of them all started talkin shit and insulting me and i got so mad i actually got up and pulled some lil douche bag in a desk away so i could get at this one girl and i got all up in her face. Then she just insulted me more so i told the teacher i was goin to the bathroom then went to the counsler. I was so pissed i was shaking. Then after that, they questioned everyone(not really just those fuckin bitches and there friends) and in my journal i had earilers written my thoughts of wat will happen to th in the future. And in the end i said they would all commit suicide cuz there so pathetic. THEN once the principal read that he said that it was a threat! They twisted that lil story AND they said i said "shutup or ill slicw your throat." which i DID NOT! Yeah no but i got kicked out of school for 10 days and my mom just decided to withdrawl me. Those bitches got one detention for "talking about topics unrelated to school." and sooooo apparently im a fucking terrorist now :-/ still fuckin pisses me off tho. Oh and did i mention i was in a maijor deppresion and suocidal and they all knew it? Yeahhhhh. Good times huh? Srry for the rant. It was in 7th grade but it still pisses me off!

Fail.

Ive been tryin to fast the past two days. Not coutin tofay cuz its only 1 in The mirn. So wed. And thurs. And i failed both days. Not today tho. Wednesday i had a bowl of choco puddin at nite. Then today. (yesterday actuLly) i had a bite of corn :-/ im a failure

Fuck

Well i wake up at 4pm. I got woken up today by my mom on the fone. She yelled at me for bein lazy then said if i dont get my ass up and clean the house shes gonna take my xbox away. And she told me to clean up the pee spot my dog made but HER fucking dog pees everywere. My dogs bigger tho. Then i fuckin smashed my finger in the door. I am so fuckin pissed rite now. Fuckin hate it!

Today...

Well i got up.it feels like a long time ago but i got up, put on a smile(fake of course) and went to my school to get my paper work. Later me and my stepdad went and got a soda. Thrn i came home and fell asleep :p then i woke up and had to help with salsa and afterwards go pick corn then help shuck it. Its been a long day :-p and i fucked up my liquid fast with choco puddin cuz imma fatass. :-/ thats basically my day. My lifes so fucking exciting huh?

Productive day? I think not.

I slept till 5 :p now im just playin vid games and talking to a wonderful amazin girl :-) and my dogs lickon me :p but yeah about this girl...its not the on i hung out wit yesterday. This girl i thought was mad at me but apparently mt txts just wernt gettin thru :) that was a big relief.

....

I went to therapy today and it went well.then i hung out with my friend and we um... Started to experiment. Now the girl i truely love hates me. Well a lil bit more now. Shes hated me for a while. I mean seriously, she thinks ive really forgotten her?!? I cant mention her because it makes me want to slice my throat. It hurts so much. She just kept pushin me away. I still cry myself to sleep alot. Right now i just wanna die. Screw life.

I miss you

Alot :-( ur sick and i hate it. I miss you. And i still love you :-/